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Started by: munkipoo Sent: 12/02/2001 22:58 9 Replies
so munkipoo what did u do today

well mate i extended my hair with bits of multicoloured cotton, speaker wire and some hair bands..

right....k... anything else at all

well being unemployed does get a little dul after oooooh 'bout 5 months...so erm......no...nothing much

nothing at all

well i had a coffee and a couple of cigs.....revised the ten commandments which im gonna post to all local villiage idiots clubs.....sorry churches....

revised?

yeah well its sorta like thou shalt not covet thy neighbours bird baring iff shes got a nice ass
thou shalt not kill....so anyone whos ever run over a dog or a cat or pulled the legs off a daddy long legs...or actually anyone whos ever had chickenpox...you're all going straight to hell....remember you are responsible for your own antibodies

ok..so a little spare time then?

yup.....kinda thinking i would take up jogging...then i realised that would interfere with 'doing nothing time'.......then i thought.....i could maybe prove einstein wrong.......but i figured well he was clever and stuff so thats that plan screwed

still its the thought that counts mate

yeah suppose so....anyways then i thought ill tell my good pals on the comm about how frikkin bored i am....and how suicide is sounding kinda jolly at the mo...thinkin, they're inventive, they'll come up with something for me to do

thats a good idea

yeah that was my good idea for the day....like in boy scout but with out the deed bit and therefore less effort

good thinkin

i did think i could stop talking to myself but theres noone else here and then people might think ya know that i was like losing it or something daft like that

now who'd think that

mum?

yeah, good point

dad?

oh yeah

all my friends?

yeah man got the piont alright!

sorry

no probs

so what u gonna do?

um i think rigth...heres the plan.....ill sit around some more and hopefully someone will think of something for me to do.....just to see if they can come up with any really cool ideas that they just dont have the time for....i mean i could think of some ideas myself but you know aswell as i do that too much strain on the ol brain cell and it'll burn out again

yeah....

so..erm...time for some serious doing nothing while i wait

you mean we?

no i.........singular!

but if we are/is singular then who u talking to?

who you talking to?

well you i think.....but that means im talkin to me too......doesnt it?

nah ur just fuckin nuts mate

oh......

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From: scott Sent: 12/02/2001 23:24 1 of 9
Well some fun things to do!
Let's see:

* Learn all the dance routine to Steps!
* Burn yourself and save the Christians the trouble!
* Burn a Christian, and see how they like it!
* Burn everyone and pretend its Guy Fawkes nite!
* Walk thru town in ur robes, get put in mental assylum, c how sane u really r!
* Walk thru town preaching about hell, fire and the party its ganna be when we get there1 (becoz we all know the Christians are right really! Don't we! Hey?)
* Burn ur house down to c if the fireman really do know how to handle those hoses and big helmets.
* Grab a copper and shout "strip search and a phone call I know my rights!"
* Commune with the Goddess to c y She's giving u the gift of all this free time!

Thanx for the welcome, here's to more chats!
Merry meet

Scott

From: Ookster Sent: 12/02/2001 23:36 2 of 9
MP,

sorry about your woes, mate. I can empathise, to a certain extent. I'm not working at the mo, coz I'm ill. I have M.E., which I've had for over 7 years now, but last September, a brain scan showed that I also had Hydrocephalus..I spent 3 weeks in hospital, whereupon they drilled a hole into my head, stuck a probe into it, and left me for a weekend looking like a moon unit. (not like moon unit zappa though, let that be noted!) They drilled the hole under a local anaesthetic, and let me assure you, being awake and able to hear the squeak of a drill and the release of pressure when the bit cracks thru your skull is worse than any horror movie. To make things even more fun, I still have the hole, its sealed over, but the skull isn't closing up..yummy:)
What I'm trying to say is-when all this happened, (and still is happening on a daily basis),I realised that I know what it feels like to be so totally lost and without any direction, and to feel completely helpless, because the one thing that is mine, my body, is being a complete arse and not doing what I want it to do. And yet..it could be so much worse...I'm 27-I want my life back!
So-I take each day as it comes, I try to walk thru that black wall of despair, and even though it's like walking thru sticky mud, and sometimes it just won't let me thru..I know I will get to the other side. And when I do, it's going to be fecking great! Because, I am so much more than an un-healthy person, just like you are so much more than being on the dole..and when we finally crack it, things are going to be so different that we're going to panic, get scared and want to hide...but we're going to stick at it, coz it is going to be fantastic in the end.

From: Ookster Sent: 12/02/2001 23:40 3 of 9
And furthermore, sorry If I was getting a bit heavy there...but if anyone wants to see fotos of me with an oil rig in my head let me know and I'll send em, or stick them on the photo album page...

(the thing is though, if it wasn't for all I have experienced, I wouldn't have become attracted to Paganism...)

From: Sapphire Sent: 12/02/2001 23:58 4 of 9
Gee... i know how it feels to be out of work... As for Ookster dont worry abt getting heavy - you can say anythin on this site and we wont think badly!!!

We all are like minded people ... Its strange about the circumstances we all get attracted to Paganism - Cld this be a thread where we all say how we got attracted to paganism???

Munkipoos strange but loveable !!

It wasnt until I read a magazine article about Paganism that i realised it existed... that was when I was abut 15.... i did some reading on the net ... before then i did crystal magick... I took no notice of it and just ignored it... then i realised i was a pathfinder but since then.. ive evolved into a wiccan....... not very exciting right!

BB
Sapphire xxxxx

From: Akasha Sent: 13/02/2001 10:19 5 of 9
have you thought of attempting to break a world record, or invent one of your own, you might like to try the following, some have been done before,

most clothespegs attacked to face and neck at one time (ouch)
largest ball of elastic bands
most times consectively watching the same movie
most amount of semen swallowed in one (actally no, the record is .96 litres, that said it could be fun producing the materials)
or on the same note, most time spent masturbating (i have a feeling i hold this, i was working on webcam this weekend and spent 20 out of 32 hours at it, damn i hate my job)
longest time spent sleeping
most balloonsburst in 1 minute (this also involves blowing them up, cunning)
longest time spent indoors (though i think this is held by a guy who was too fat to leave his bedroom and it was years)
most amount of plastic attached to head at one time??
most amount of creme eggs consumed in a 24 hour period
most amount of mini shredded wheat fit in mouth at one time (i can do11)
most amount of dead people eaten in 24 hours
longest time spent without washing

or alternatively in the words of jarvis cocker "cut you hair and get a job"

just a thought.



lots of love and balloons (and cuddles for ooks, get well soon)

kash

From: Star Sent: 13/02/2001 10:46 6 of 9
Hello munkipoo,

Here are a few time wasters for you, should keep you busy for 5 mins:

http://www.mediafarm.no/forsoksgard/kukaster.asp

http://www.ferryhalim.com/cowgame/

Use one of the following a day every day (to be taken after meals):

Useful Phrases
=====================
1) Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2) The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
3) I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4) Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5) I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
6) I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7) What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
8) I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
9) I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10) Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...
11) I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
12) It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
13) Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
14) No, my powers can only be used for good.
15) How about never? Is never good for you?
16) I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
17) You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
18) I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
19) I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
20) I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
21) Who me? I just wander from room to room.
22) My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
23) It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really
quite busy.
24) At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
25) You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
26) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
27) Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

And finally: Just be glad this isn't you ..........!!

http://www.geocities.com/lonely451_2000/me.html

From: Star Sent: 14/02/2001 16:43 7 of 9
Heres one you might identify with, and will hopefully cheer you up too!

>Signs you've had too much of 2000's
>
>You try to enter your password on the microwave.
>
>You haven't played patience with real cards in years.
>
>You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
>
>You e-mail your work colleague at the desk next to you to ask, "Do you
>fancy going to lunch?" and they reply, "Yeah, give me five minutes".
>
>You chat several times a day with a stranger from South America, but you
>haven't
>spoken to your next-door neighbour yet this year.
>
>Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have
>e-mail addresses.
>
>Your idea of being organised is multi-coloured post-it notes.
>
>You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
>
>When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a "9" to get
>an outside line.
>
>Your CV is on a diskette in your pocket.
>
>Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose all your best jokes.
>
>Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
>
>You read this entire list, kept nodding and smiling.

From: GothsChilde Sent: 14/02/2001 19:56 8 of 9
As an add on to the 'To Much of the 2000's' I thought I'd just add:
*Talking in internet speak to your REAL LIFE friends (e.g. 'laugh out loud' 'roll on floor laughing'). Has anyone else reached this state too???? Answers on a postcard please...

Well.....I have such an interesting life I thought I'd give you a run down of my general day to give you some ideas...

2:00pm Fall outta bed, wake-up accordingly.
2:01pm Try to remember who I am, how I got here, where the hell ' here' is.
2:29pm Give up and decide to crawl to the bathroom.
4:00pm Arrive at the bathroom, having passed various items such as shopping trolleys, orange cones, decomposing flat mates on the way.
4:01pm Start throwing up before reaching the toilet.
4:30pm Fall asleep in own vomit.
7:30pm Wake up.
7:31pm Try to remember where I am, and who's vomit I'm actually lying in.
7:40pm Realise I'm supposed to be meeting friend in pub in 20 mins.
7:41pm Look in mirror realising 'I CAN'T GO OUT LOOKING LIKE THIS!'
7:42pm Put some powder over vomit-covered part of face, and mascara smudges under eyes.
7:43pmPut some hairspray on dishevelled hair, trying to get away with 'the just got outta bed look'.
7:44pm Look down noticing I still have lastnights (only slightly dodgy looking) dress on, so head for the door.
8.00pm Arrive at pub.
8:01pm Down 10 pints.
8:02pm Notice the increasingly good looking guy in the corner.
8:03pm Take a mint to get rid of sick - breath , then go over and talk to him......
2:00pm Roll outta bed , waking-up accordingly..........

Do you feel better about your life now munki?

From: Ookster Sent: 14/02/2001 20:40 9 of 9
Gothschilde, with ref to:
As an add on to the 'To Much of the 2000's' I thought I'd just add:
*Talking in internet speak to your REAL LIFE friends (e.g. 'laugh out loud' 'roll on floor laughing'). Has anyone else reached this state too???? Answers on a postcard please...
My dan a few years back had a few too many bevvies, as was his want, and was absolutely paraletic. Picture the seen, blokey on bog, trousers round ankles..spewing out...
Internet addresses, ISDN numbers, Binary, all sorts of numeric protocols. The shame, the embarrassment..I mean, most blokes go...'I love you, PUKE!'-Instead, I have a muppet wittering on about how we had to dial up using such and such port or we'd be buggered.

Prat.